This hypothesis stopped Zhuo Xiang Ming’s breathing for a moment, and it wasn’t until Tong Yan frowned that he realized that he was grabbing Tong Yan’s arm using too much force.
”I’m sorry.” He let go and loosely wrapped his hands around Tong Yan’s waist.
Tong Yan asked: “Sorry for what?”
Zhuo Xiang Ming: “Everything.”
Saying this was equivalent to saying nothing, Tong Yan asked: “Do you love me?”
Zhuo Xiang Ming immediately said: “I love you! Of course I love you.”
Tong Yan asked: “And do you believe that I love you?”
Zhuo Xiang Ming: “I believe.”
Tong Yan asked tiredly: “Then what’s the problem between us?”
Zhuo Xiang Ming seemed to have nothing to say, his lips moved, but he didn’t say anything in the end.
Tong Yan’s tone and expression made him feel unprecedented guilt. He wanted to give Tong Yan a fresh and passionate love, but the effective period of this love was really too short. He wanted to make Tong Yan feel happy and free, but it was always too difficult to act.
”Can you tell me what you were thinking?” Tong Yan changed the question, “What were you thinking about when talking to the teacher?”
Zhuo Xiang Ming’s brows furrowed, silent and still.
The two looked at each other for a long time. Tong Yan’s expression gradually took on a coldness that he had never seen before, a level of coldness that was even icier than indifference.
Then Zhuo Xiang Ming’s phone rang, and the silence was interrupted. Tong Yan pushed Zhuo Xiang Ming’s hands away in a smooth motion, trying to turn around and get out of bed, saying: “Forget it.”
Zhuo Xiang Ming merely stared blankly for a moment. Fortunately, his reaction was quick enough this time, and he rushed out of bed, kneeling beside the bed in an awkward kneeling position, hugging Tong Yan’s legs as he was trying to put on his slippers.
Tong Yan was uneasy, struggling hard, shoving his shoulders again, but the strength disparity between the two was huge. If Zhuo Xiang Ming truly didn’t want to let him go, even moving around was difficult.
Tong Yan yelled, flustered: “Let me go!”
Zhuo Xiang Ming breathed: “I can’t let you go.”
”What do you want?” Tong Yan’s legs were firmly clasped, he could only incessantly push Zhuo Xiang Ming’s shoulders, “Zhuo Xiang Ming, let go!”
Zhuo Xiang Ming didn’t speak for a long time. As soon as Tong Yan displayed some signs of exhaustion, he freed up a hand to grab Tong Yan’s hand: “Baby, I know I was wrong.”
”You don’t know!” Tong Yan sobbed in anger, “Don’t call me that, let me go, I want to go home!”
Zhuo Xiang Ming pressed Tong Yan’s hand firmly to his face, saying in that still low and stubborn tone: “This is your home, where are you going?”
Tong Yan was going to die from anger over this guy’s roguishness. He didn’t know that not being able to move after struggling, and having your strength be completely suppressed was so aggravating. Tong Yan sniffled, then started shedding tears, unable to stop, it flowed out in strings, wetting his entire face.
Seeing this, Zhuo Xiang Ming immediately rose up in a panic and hugged him. Tong Yan’s legs, which were set free, kicked his thighs and lower abdomen during the struggle. It was like Zhuo Xiang Ming couldn’t feel anything. His body that was significantly more robust than Tong Yan’s created a cage that seemed to be tailored for Tong Yan. He encircled him in his arms, and no matter how Tong Yan struggled, he just bowed his head to kiss Tong Yan’s tears, coaxing him: “Don’t cry anymore Baby, don’t cry.”
The two of them jostled each other without suspense for a while, then Tong Yan suddenly cried out: “Are you still human? How can you be hard at a time like this?”
Tong Yan’s pheromones were filling the room. With the combination of Tong Yan sitting in his arms, twisting his hips and butt, and his extreme love for Tong Yan, even when he was cross-examining and sobbing, the physiological response came quickly but untimely. Zhuo Xiang Ming’s complexion changed and changed, finally, he dully said: “I’m sorry.”
”Don’t get hard!” Tong Yan was still crying.
The boy felt extremely wronged, but Zhuo Xiang Ming couldn’t think of a way. The more he looked at Tong Yan, the harder he got, and if he was in his arms, it was impossible for him to get rid of it.
Tong Yan really couldn’t tire Zhuo Xiang Ming out, he gradually stopped moving. Ignoring the thing pressed against his buttocks, he curled up weakly in Zhuo Xiang Ming’s embrace, just sobbing sporadically.
Zhuo Xiang Ming wiped his tears with the palm of his hand for a while, but found that his red eyes became more and more obvious, so he leaned over and pulled the bathrobe beside the bed, gently wiping his face with the hem. Afterwards, he said, sounding very troubled: “It’s fine to scold and hit me, please don’t cry Tong Tong.”
Tong Yan himself also felt ashamed, but the sluice gate on his sadness had barely opened, he couldn’t stop crying just because he was asked.
The boy cried in his arms. Zhuo Xiang Ming looked as if a few pieces of his flesh had been gouged out of his body, and it was even the type of gouging method that was applied to the most painful areas. At this point, he would do anything for him, let alone merely confessing.
”I’ve thought about this matter before, your college entrance exams, but I only found out that your exam application was already filled out when I went for the parent talk last week, and it was even confirmed in both your first and second year.” Zhuo Xiang Ming’s chin was next to Tong Yan’s sweaty forehead, he was hugging him tightly, “The teacher told me about your grades. They’re very good. The other procedures had already gone through, and the recommendation letter was even less of an issue … she was very confident in you.”
Tong Yan let out a sobbing hiccup: “I asked you, what were you thinking.”
Zhuo Xiang Ming didn’t dare stay silent again, Tong Yan could feel how tense he was as he talked, as if he was biting the bullet: “I hated it.”
”You’re mine. You should eat at the same table as me and sleep in my bed at night, I hated it!” Zhuo Xiang Ming’s voice sounded a bit pained, “You’re mine.”
Tong Yan wept: “Your hate consisted of signing it without even asking me, then coming back here and spending all day distracted? Did you think you were being oh so noble? Why are you so maddening … sniff … you’re hateful, deliberately making yourself miserable, appearing so generous … why are you so hateful?”
Tong Yan’s tears came too quickly. When he was pushing and shoving Zhuo Xiang Ming a moment ago, he was too emotional, so now his voice was a little hoarse.
Zhuo Xiang Ming’s heart felt like it had been brutally rubbed by sandpaper, it hurt so much, “Calm down, OK? Don’t cry, I’ll tell you everything later, OK? I’m so sorry, Tong Tong, don’t cry.”
However, Tong Yan seemed to want to hurt him this time. He was so sorrowful that he had forgotten how to breathe, his originally white face was completely red, tears were hanging from his pointed chin, dripping down bit by bit.
Zhuo Xiang Ming suffered this pain willingly. Some ailments had to be treated at their roots in a really painful way, but he was most reluctant to use this method, and it hurts just as much to bring Tong Yan with him.
”It would’ve been fine, you just had to ask me. That school wasn’t my choice. I’ve never thought about going to any particular school. Tong Yang said it was a good school, so I filled it out … Couldn’t you have just asked?” Tong Yan had no strength left. His chin was propped on Zhuo Xiang Ming’s shoulder, tears falling again. He sucked in a breath and said, “Why didn’t you ask me? Do you know how sad I was when I saw that letter of intent?”
Originally, this was a very small matter. Even if Tong Yan really wanted to go to that foreign school, transportation methods were so convenient nowadays. And even if Zhuo Xiang Ming was too busy to spare time, he could still come back on the weekends. There was no such thing as not seeing each other for one or two months.
What saddened Tong Yan was that Zhuo Xiang Ming seemed to have a habit of never expressing his desires. He was always silent and generous, making Tong Yan think that he could stop this kind of generosity at any time, then just walk away.
For a split second, Tong Yan thought about that possibility: Maybe Zhuo Xiang Ming didn’t love him that much. Zhuo Xiang Ming could give up on a lot of emotional aspects, and Tong Yan wasn’t special to him.
This possibility was enough to make Tong Yan collapse.
”I’m scared I’ll tie you down.” Zhuo Xiang Ming said with difficulty, “Do you know how young you are? Your life has barely begun, and you’ve never seen the world. I’m scared of tying you down.”
After a while, Tong Yan asked in a quiet voice: “Well … you’re older than me, your life has begun, and you’ve seen the world. If you had to choose between those experiences and me, what would you choose?”
Hearing this question, Zhuo Xiang Ming’s already sober head seemed to have been smashed by another fist.
He squeezed Tong Yan in his arms, but he couldn’t get any closer, because he only wanted to make Tong Yan happy with his love, not hurt him.
”There’s no need to choose, I only want you.” He heard himself say.
He only wanted Tong Yan, he was never going to pretend to be noble again, he wasn’t a noble man at all. In love, not only was he despicable, he was also a complete pervert. He only wanted Tong Yan, and Tong Yan could only be his.
Tong Yan was sitting on Zhuo Xiang Ming’s lap, face to face with his legs spread apart. He slowly stopped crying, his eyes and face terribly hot. He knew how pathetic he looked, and he really didn’t want Zhuo Xiang Ming to see his face. So, he continued to embrace him like that, his chin poking Zhuo Xiang Ming’s shoulder, and his cheek, wet with sweat and tears, pressed against Zhuo Xiang Ming’s ears and hair.
Zhuo Xiang Ming’s words were getting more and more indecent. Tong Yan wanted him to be frank, but an adult’s frankness didn’t seem to be easily digestible by him.
”Where’s your phone?” Tong Yan sullenly interrupted, “Wasn’t it ringing just now?”
At that time, Tong Yan looked like he was going to leave, how could Zhuo Xiang Ming have a mind to care about the cell phone? The two struggled for a while, and no more ringing was heard.
He hugged Tong Yan with one arm and groped inside the quilt with the other. After finding the phone, he unlocked it. It was a call from Tong Li Qin. He must’ve accidentally connected the call when he grabbed for Tong Yan, the screen showed: Call Duration, 2 minutes and 45 seconds
He didn’t know how much was heard, but Tong Yan crying out that he was hard and inhuman was certainly heard.
Flowering season Small O’s diary: The first sentence after getting up every day, “Miss Zhou, don’t be antisocial”.
Miss- Dàxiǎojie, eldest daughter of an affluent family /bossy or indulged young woman / Miss High and Mighty
Congrats on your first real couple fight you crazy kids